DearSusan,


What a choice. The grand final, finale, farewell of Master Chef or the Trunks and Juli (a) show, otherwise known as the mass debate. I'd invested so much time in M C already, I couldn't not watch the end. So I spent the hours between 7.30 and 9.30 on Sunday night watching Callum cauterise a carrot and Adam agitate an aubergine. They were the longest 11 hours of my life.


What is it about M C that makes it so 'apeeling'? I mean four million people tuned in to watch it!!! It can't be the challenges, eg "taste this Beef Burgundy and name the ingredients". Easy ..... Beef, mushrooms water and the Maggi packet. "Name these three cheeses"..... Soft, hard and 'smells like vomit'.




Then the invention test and the core ingredient is a CHICKEN. OH NO not a chicken. Whatever will I do with it? Well here's a thought, put it in a saucepan of water with an onion, boil the s..t out of it, take out the bones and serve the remaining meat and liquid to someone with bird flu. A complete no brainer.


Speaking of serves, the economics of their plated up dishes really messes with my head. They use a pantryful of ingredients, a pig and four dozen eggs and come up with enough food to feed an anorexic. If a waiter placed that 'portion' in front of me I'd use Adrian's old standby "Yes that's it I'll have some of that"


I loved the dessert Callum and Adam 'put up' though. A cumquat creamy, granita, meringue, ice cream burnt biscuit encrusted, 'egg', loosely called a Cumquat May. AND they were given FOUR HOURS to complete it. Hell I've dished up a three course meal to fifty people in less time using a primus stove and a jaffle iron. Anyway I was glad Adam won but Eloise thinks Callum is the perfect man. "Mum he cooks awesome food and he comes second" Guess she has a point.



How are the plans going for the fibro shack renovations? At least you'll be able to forget about it while you are OS. I'm going to be so miserable. Who will I play with? Josie says I can go down to Melbourne and hang out with Tallulah. Rosie has invited me up to taste her creations from chef school and Eloise has offered me any two of her five kids at any time should I get lonely. And of course I'll be able to use your SVU to take mum and dad to their doctors' appointments. So I should survive. But I will miss you.


And by the time you get back I might have hooked up. I mean my cyberspace courting is going really well. I almost replied to Bruce the Brave who is a "professional with bad breath and body odour". He just wants a bit on the side because he lives with a woman. But when I thought about it I realised I'd been there before. Probably won't pursue that one any further.


I did actually go out for lunch with a guy I met through the newspaper dating service. You know, you ring his number, if he's interested he rings your number, and you play telephone ping pong until one of you suggests coffee. Well when I heard his voice I had a hot flush. He sounded like Sean Connery only sexy. We arranged to meet at a restaurant. He would be wearing jeans, a sports coat and the compulsory rose between his teeth. As each guy walked in I held my breath. Then "Please God not him". He was a six foot four inch Woody Allen clone. His voice almost did it for me except that he only used it to talk about football, motor racing and what a bitch his last girlfriend had been. I excused myself to go to the ladies room. I hope he's not still there waiting for me to come back.


Love you heaps. Stay safe have a great time,give my regards to broadway and bring me back a pressie. I like small, gold and expensive.



Love

Janet